http://stevenbms.edublogs.org hey this is my awsome bloging site for my english Fri, 20 Mar 2009 04:16:09 -0400 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.2 hourly 1 http://stevenbms.edublogs.org/2009/03/19/final/comment-page-1/#comment-13 daylan Fri, 20 Mar 2009 04:16:09 +0000 http://stevenbms.edublogs.org/?p=29#comment-13 Great story :) Try putting your dialoge in paragraphs though ! Great story Try putting your dialoge in paragraphs though !

]]> http://stevenbms.edublogs.org/2009/03/19/final/comment-page-1/#comment-12 Jaspal'in! Fri, 20 Mar 2009 00:21:40 +0000 http://stevenbms.edublogs.org/?p=29#comment-12 Great story! I really liked how well you went into detail, but you really need to add some diologue and stuff into your storry, you described thoughts and feelings well, but make him talk more and it could really improve your story! Great story! I really liked how well you went into detail, but you really need to add some diologue and stuff into your storry, you described thoughts and feelings well, but make him talk more and it could really improve your story!

]]> http://stevenbms.edublogs.org/2009/03/15/27/comment-page-1/#comment-11 Jaspal'in! Fri, 20 Mar 2009 00:20:24 +0000 http://stevenbms.edublogs.org/2009/03/15/27/#comment-11 Great story! I really liked how well you went into detail, but you really need to add some diologue and stuff into your storry, you described thoughts and feelings well, but make him talk more and it could really improve your story! Great story! I really liked how well you went into detail, but you really need to add some diologue and stuff into your storry, you described thoughts and feelings well, but make him talk more and it could really improve your story!

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